Finally an alumni! |
On the 10th of September 2015, I finally took my last leap in my diploma days ie my graduation day. Believe me, the road leading me to this success was treacherous and rough, but alhamdulillah, all praises only to Allah, He helped and guided me to make it through even the toughest of storm.
3 years studying for a diploma in counseling was actually hard for me. It is not that I am not interested in the field, because believe me, I would exchange nothing for this opportunity to be able to study (it may not be psychology, but at least it's something very close!) counseling and learn the steps of what my school counselors had gone through. I found the reason why my school counselors behaved like how they were, and slowly, I almost became them. In a good way, you know. A very good way.
During those 3 years of struggling, I did not just suffered physically, having to deal with being sick far away from my family, and whatnot, but I also suffered psychologically. In psychological terms, I almost did not made it through, you know. In that period of 3 years, I had fallen a lot. I did not stumble or stagger, but I fell and went deep inside a dark hole. I was barely able to breathe and believe me, you have no idea how much tears I've shed and how very miserable I felt during my dark days.
I sound depressed; maybe I am, but I survived every step of it. There was one time during my third semester that I suffered a terrible anxiety attack that has caused me to be severely depressed. Those days were not known by anyone, and I feel like I need to share it with the world, because denying that it happened would be only causing pain than relief. I believe that there was a reason to that terrible breakdown. It had caused me to lose interest and focus, and I spent many days isolating myself from my friends and housemates. The thing was, I had made such many wonderful friends at college that despite them not knowing anything, they had given me enough strength to let me get a grip of myself and to continue living. I thank them for that.
After 3 years, I am able to understand the fundamentals of the human psychology, and slowly emphasize myself to becoming, acting and thinking like a counselor. I had changed my perspectives in many things. I was always told that I was a pessimist, and despite I still have some thoughts that aren't good, I am still walking and trying my best to survive each and every day.
I am a counseling diploma graduate, and when others see us learning counseling to counsel others, we are actually learning to define ourselves first. 3 years of studying counseling, 3 years of enduring pain, heartbreak, disappointment, frustration, sadness and joy. 3 years were spent learning and researching about all these emotions. 3 years were spent learning about my flaws, learning the reason why I act the way I act. 3 years were spent soul searching and 3 years were spent awesomely exiting the dark tunnel from the past.
Graduation day isn't only a celebratory event for accomplishing 3 years of studies, but it is also a day of congratulatory for us achieving a new phase of life. A new perspective of life that the old us had never knew existed. Supposedly, these 3 years were years that should be etched and cherished for eternity.
Ah! I am rambling.
Ah! I am rambling.